unspeakables
Thursday, January 17, 2008 @ 8:31 PM
okay. this is not gna be a happy post. ): jo! i really miss you loads. being in the same class as you i think is a luxury. somehow u always make me feel listened to and i guess alive. i'll know that u'll be there for me. if i wanna get stuff, study or simply hang around and slack. i know u'll try ur best. minus those sleeping and wanna go home times.. and most of the time i don't need to think about what to say. it just flows. and that's why i love t7 so much. although we've problems along the way.. most of us actually do like each other. and we're really like a big family. being a little bimbotic with shaz, tiffy and steffi. talking about old times and orchard with anne! listening to milli's philosophical views. having heart to heart talks with fabian. suanning rosel all day long. grossing joyce out with my xiang gong! i always had something to smile about. at least i was kinda liked. could talk with the whole class. i miss t7 lots.
gosh. see me now. like a retard. and gen! i finally get what u mean. in sec 4 and all? sighs. i think retaining robs one of interesting-ness. makes me dull. or maybe i just can't understand. i'll keep trying. what else can i do? i don't want things to get worse. and i don't wanna leave regretting not even having like people to talk to for the whole year. i'll DIE!
it's these times that made me really regret and feel stupid. i couldn't even work hard for a few months. please just stab me. that few months caused me 2 years of anguish. that wasn't a rational choice. as the days go by i'm drained bit by bit. feeling the most insecure and confused i have been in years. honestly, i don't know what i'll do without the choir people. like ernest! im supposed to be consoled i guess!
